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  • Chris Crosby

How Do I Have a Relationship With Someone I Can't See?

What if you could have a relationship with someone who would care more about you than your closest loved one? What if they could be trusted with every secret, every private area of your heart, and you still know they would be there for you regardless of the situation?

They would not judge you for your past, would not criticize you for what you did or didn’t do. They would love you no matter what you did. What if they could not love you more regardless of what you do? They would never love you less regardless of what you did or didn’t do. Although our mind tells us this is impossible, it is not. We can have that relationship with God, our Heavenly Father. He moved heaven and hell to make this possible, sacrificing His one and only Son, so we can have that relationship with Him. (See Genesis 1:26-27)

Many have asked how you can have relationship with someone you cannot see, touch or even audibly hear. We struggle with long distance relationships when we have texts, phone calls or face time. For us to go to the next level by having a relationship with someone who doesn’t respond to text messages or answer a phone call, it can be difficult to comprehend. Yet, God has given us an entire love letter via His Word to understand His desire and promises for us. He details His plans for our lives and how we can find purpose and meaning through a relationship with Him. In the Bible, He has already anticipated every situation we would face and provided the needed answers.

He also has given us His Holy Spirit who speaks in that still small voice directing our steps in the day-to-day of life decisions and troubles. He drops ideas, dreams, direction into our lives if we choose to accept them. He allows others to speak into our lives, teaching, training, encouraging and supporting, whether they realize it or not.

The other side of this relationship is allowing God into areas of our lives that we have kept closed off and private. Although we know He already knows everything, we still build walls around areas that we don’t want to address or where we feel vulnerable and scared. Perhaps we feel God will ask something of us that we can’t do or that we are not willing to surrender to Him. Maybe we feel this will be too hard, that we will have to give up dreams or desires that we have clung to for a long time. We forget the times He has asked things of us and found out that what He wanted was so much better than we could have dreamed for ourselves. (Jeremiah 29:11, "For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, says the Lord, thoughts of peace and not of evil, to give you a future and a hope.")

A good relationship with God requires vulnerability. Vulnerability opens the door for hurt. Yet the Great Gardener knows what needs to be cut away for true healing to take place. For advancement. Correction. Discipline. Realignment. Refined purpose. The initial pain is but for a moment compared to the vast rewards and riches that result. The hurt is like pruning. Areas that will not yield the best fruit need to be cut away so the right areas will have the resources and nutrients necessary for adequate growth.

Relationship is a two-way street. When we spend time in a relationship we have to talk, but we also need to listen. To someone who is not accustomed to quiet and stillness, this can take some time to develop. When we stop and listen for God to speak to us, He will. We need to quiet our mind of our constantly busy life of “to-do” lists and activities. Just as we would for a friend who wanted time with us, we need to put away the phone, the computer, the distractions, and focus. We need to be attentive and intentional. God wants to speak into our lives, but He is patient and won’t force Himself on us. He will speak, but we need to direct our attention to Him and listen.

Through prayer, we need to praise Him, just as we would a friend for things we appreciate. We need to say thank you for His provision and care. We need to lay our dreams and desires as His feet, trusting that since He planted our dreams, He will be the safe place to care for and provide the way for them to come to pass.

It is mind-blowing to think that the Creator of the universe wants relationship with me. That He sent His one and only Son to die so He could have that relationship. He provided a way for me to become a child of God and obtain an eternal inheritance. He did all the work to make this possible. There is no one I can trust more than God to meet my every need, to hear the cry of my heart without taking advantage or using it against me.

If you have any thoughts or questions about relationship with God, please reply in the comment section or email via the link below. I look forward to hearing from you.

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